By Zynder
zboy@fastmail.com
Copyright 2024 by Zynder, all rights reserved
* * * * *Middle School Swim Team - Part 1
Jonesboro Middle School is
grades six through eight. The students are between eleven and fourteen.
I was in sixth grade last year and this coming year I’ll be in seventh
grade. What makes that so important is that is the first year boys can
be on the school swim team. As a sixth grader, I was allowed to
practice in the school pool when it wasn’t being used for classes, team
practices or meets. I was there every time I could get into the pool.
Being on the school swim team is all I’ve dreamed about since I was
nine years old. I’m twelve now and I want to be on the team more than
anything else in the world.
One would think just the opposite
since the team wears those really skimpy swim briefs and I’m probably
the most modest boy on the planet. I’m so modest, I wear not only
Jammers to swim in, but a swim shirt as well. For anyone that isn’t
familiar with a swim Jammer, it’s a suit that goes from your waist all
the way to your knees. I change in and out of it in a stall in the
changing room and I never shower at school. Now, I know the school swim
team wears swim briefs that cover absolutely nothing. Heck, you can see
the outline of the boy’s penis in those skimpy suits. But I feel really
strongly that the swim coach will make an exception for me, because of
how fast I swim and let me wear my Jammers. He probably won’t let me
wear my swim shirt, but as long as I can wear Jammers, I can deal with
people seeing my skinny chest, minuscule nipples and deep innie belly
button.
The other reason I’m so modest and have been ever
since I started school and compared my penis with the other boys is
that my penis is also minuscule. Evidently, according to my mother, I
used to play naked inside the house as well as out in the yard when I
was small. That all changed once I started school and began playing
naked games with classmates. I realized very quickly that I had the
smallest penis of every boy in my class and eventually discovered my
penis is the smallest in my school. In first grade it got to be a
practice that us boys would compare our penises during recess. Mine was
always the smallest. I know now, what I didn’t know then that this
comparing was developing a modesty inferiority complex in me. Now, at
twelve-years-old it is set as part of my personality. Even my doctor,
when he gives me my school and swimming physical doesn’t look at my
penis. He just puts his hand inside my briefs, pushes on my nuts and
has me cough. No one has seen my boy parts since I was in first grade
and no one ever will.
Today is a special assembly for those
students that want to go out for sports this school year. All the
different coaches for both boys and girls sports will be there to give
a presentation, take names of perspective students wishing to try out
and be available to ask questions and get answers. It’s for both
parents and students, which is why the gymnasium started out quite
full.
Each coach gave their presentation and then went off
to the side of the gym with those students that wished to sign up for
tryouts or ask questions. The coaches stayed even after they finished
with their group of students, because some students are signing up for
more than one sport and some coaches coach more than one sport. Of
course, the order of coaches and sports being offered is done in
accordance with the ranking of the sport in the school. Football being
number one, followed closely by basketball. Then there is wrestling,
tennis, and volleyball. Swimming is the very last sport offered. Even
girl’s swimming is offered before boy’s swimming. Swimming events, it
so happens, are the least attended sport at our school.
By
the time the girls are done and leave the gym, there are only a handful
of us boys left sitting on the bleachers ready to have our chance to
hear the coach and sign up for try-outs. I look at it as less
competition for a spot on the team.
“Good afternoon boys!”
“Good afternoon coach.”
“I am pleasantly surprised to see a good dozen of you here to sign up
for try-outs. I was certain by now rumors would have spread and very
few if any of you would be here. If you already don’t know, two of our
starters will not be on the team this year. They transferred to another
school once they heard the rumors of the new plan for increasing
attendance at home swim meets.”
He pauses for a few seconds, so that we can absorb what he said and the implications and opportunities it presents.
“If you haven’t figured out what this means for you, it is simple.
There are two new spots on the team as well as the spots available from
those who graduated to high school over the summer. That means that
half of you have the opportunity to make the team this year.”
I instantly realize what it means for me. I have a much better chance
to wear my Jammers and maybe even my swim shirt. If the team is short
handed, then my odds just went up tremendously.
“I can see the
gears in your heads spinning with the possibilities. So, I will make
things even more to your liking. I am prepared to accept all of you on
the team. Those not being starters, would be alternates. You will still
have to attend try-outs, so that I can see that you can actually swim,
but if you are proficient and meet minimum speed standards, you will
make the team.”
We all applaud loudly. We are cheering and
hollering and just having fun, because all the stress that all of us
have felt for the past few years about making our school team just got
lifted off of us.
“I am happy that you are all happy, but back
to business. As I mentioned at the beginning. Two of our starters left,
because they did not like the new plan to increase attendance at meets.
Attendance is necessary for this program to continue. We have the least
attendance at our meets than any of the other sports. We do not have to
generate enough money to make a profit, like the football team does,
but we do have to generate enough money, so this program isn’t a drain
on the school. The way we are going to do that is by having every home
meet a nude swim meet.”
Coach says it and then just lets it
hang in the air as each of us try to digest just what he actually said.
When the look of total shock leaves our faces and before we start
yelling questions he continues.
“Starting this school year,
all of the boy’s practices will be done nude. All home meets the boys
will swim nude. Away meets you will wear school swim briefs. Try-outs
will be done nude and open to the entire school body to watch. All of
this is for the sole purpose of generating interest in the meets and to
generate revenue, so this program can make it.”
Again he pauses and lets us digest this added information, before he continues.
“I am going to start with questions from perspective swimmers, before
answering parents questions. If you have a question stand up. I will
point to you and then give us your name, age and grade before asking
your question.”
I, along with every other boy in the gym stands.
“You. The boy with red hair.”
“I am Cullan McGregor. I’m twelve-years-old and I’m going into the seventh grade.”
“Thank you for your interest in swimming for our school. What is your question?”
“Coach. I’ve been working for three years to make your team and now you
say I can be on it, but I have to be naked. How am I going to do that
when I hate being seen naked?”
“Cullan. That is why I’m
telling you about this now, so you can start preparing yourself for
swimming nude. It’s also why we are having nude practices to help you
get used to being nude and swimming nude without that distraction
slowing you down.”
“The boy beside Cullan.”
“I am Kevin Collins. I am twelve-years-old, going into seventh grade.”
“Thank you Kevin for showing an interest in the swim team. What is your question?”
“Coach. Are practices going to be open, so everyone can see us, because
I don’t know if I can concentrate if lots of people are making noise
when I’m trying to learn from you?”
“That’s a good question,
Kevin. No. Practices are closed and the doors are locked with an adult
monitoring them during all practices. Like you said. We take that
precaution, so you can hear me and you can learn how to swim faster
without distractions.”
“The next boy behind Kevin.”
“I am Trevor Godwin. I am thirteen-years-old, going into eighth grade. I’m transferring from a middle school from upstate.”
“Hello Trevor. Nice to have you at our school. What is your question?”
“I’m okay with swimming naked. I skinny-dipped a lot back home. My
question is why have the try-outs naked and open to the whole school?”
“Trevor, I am sure you will be one of the very few that will be
comfortable swimming nude in front of people, but I’m happy that you
are interested in joining our school swim team. As for why the open
try-outs, it is for the simple reason we want our home meets to be the
talk of the town and the school, so we can get as many paying people to
come watch you swim as possible.”
Coach takes questions from
all of us boys as well as our parents, who are mostly concerned about
just how legal this is. We are assured it is legal and that all home
meets will have police presence to assure safety. Those seem to be our
parents two greatest concerns. As for us actually being naked, our
parents seem to be all for that. When I look over at my mom and dad
they smile at me and give me a wink. As for me, I listen to every
question and answer, and nothing said is helping me to calm down from
the anxiety I have from hearing all of this. I’m actually getting more
and more anxious as I listen to everything, knowing that there is no
way out of swimming naked if I want to be on the swim team. I’m not
even sure I can go to the try-outs now that I’ll have to swim naked in
front of my school mates. My world is spinning right now and I don’t
know how to right it.
“If that is all of your questions. I
have a clip board here and I ask you to sign it if you still want to be
on the team and go to try-outs on the first Friday after school starts.”
“Coach!”
“Yes, Cullan.”
“Can we change our minds later if we sign up today? I ask, because I
really want to be on the team, but this having to be naked has me
really worried?”
“Yes. Cullan. Signing this sheet is not like
signing up for the military. It’s not a contract. It’s letting me know
how many of you I can hope to have on the team. You are free to quit
the team any time you wish. I hope you don’t quit, but you always have
that option.”
“Thank you, Coach. I’ll sign it then.”
I notice that three boys and their parents were heading for the door
without signing, but two of them turned back around and come to sign
after Coach said we could quit later if we wanted to.
I’m
quiet on my ride back home. My little brother and sister jabber away at
me swimming naked and asking if they can go and watch me. Mom assures
them if I swim on the team that the whole family will go to support me.
No one asks me anything. I’m left alone with my thoughts, which are
racing a mile a minute in my head. I can see images of myself stark
naked with the whole school staring at my nakedness. I can visualize my
naked nine-year-old brother and equally naked ten-year-old sister
dancing around me while I’m naked waiting to swim at a meet. They still
take bathes together, so being naked is fun for them. What makes my
brother dancing naked around me a nightmare is that his penis is bigger
than mine. I’m three years older than him and his penis is a lot bigger
than mine. All I can think about is how embarrassing this is and how
much more embarrassing it will be if I go through with it. I only have
a week from this Friday to decide for certain. School starts this
Thursday, then Friday and then the weekend and then Friday for the
try-outs. Not much time to decide.
When we get home. Mom goes
to start supper. Ian and Erin go to the backyard to play. I go to my
room to think. I have no idea where dad went off to. I remove my shoes
and socks, so I can stretch-out on my bed and think. This is how I
think best. I just close my eyes and let my mind go where it goes. Dad
says it’s the Irish way to try and make sense out of things without
destroying it through violence. We have a reputation for destroying
rather than thinking. Even though my ancestors have lived in America
for generations now, we still have two very Irish traits. We still have
our tempers and our red hair.
Knock. Knock.
Two very soft knocks on my door.
“Cullan. May I come in?”
“Sure, dad.”
He walks in and before I can get up he says.
“No. Son. Don’t get up. Just lay there and relax.”
He walks over and sits on the edge of my bed, so he can look down at me as I stay stretched out in front of him.
“Cullan. You want to talk about it?”
“Yes. But it’s so embarrassing to talk about.”
“That’s why I’m in here. You can talk to me without it being as embarrassing.”
“But it is Da. They want me to swim naked in front of everyone. It doesn’t get any more embarrassing than that?”
“If it bothers you that much for people to see you naked, then don’t do the try-outs and don’t swim on the team.”
“But, Da. That’s all I’ve wanted to do since I was Ian’s age.”
“Your brother would jump at the chance to swim naked.”
“He can, because no one will laugh at him being naked.”
“Cullan. No one is going to laugh at you. They might laugh with you and the other boys, but never at you.”
“But they will, Da. They’ll take one look at me and start laughing.”
“I don’t understand, Cullan. Why do you think they will laugh at you and not the other boys?”
“I don’t think it, Da. I know it.”
“Why do you know it then?”
“It’s too embarrassing to talk about?”
“More embarrassing than when I talked to you about puberty and masturbation?”
“DA! Gross! Why did you have to bring that up?”
“Because you told me that was the most embarrassing thing ever. If you
survived talking to me about that, then you can survive talking to me
about swimming naked on your school’s team.”
“This is more embarrassing than that.”
“Cullan. How can you and I talking about playing with your penis and
ejaculating be less embarrassing than just skinny-dipping at school?”
“Da. We had that conversation and then it was over. Well, over until
you just brought it back up, but me swimming naked in front of everyone
will last forever. I’ll be embarrassed even more every time I do it and
the kids at school will make my life really bad during school.”
“Cullan, I think you might be over reacting. Yes, the kids at school
seeing you boys naked will be a shock and they will tease all of you
for a little while about seeing you naked, but soon it will be just
normal and the teasing will go away. It’s just normal kid teasing and
pranking.”
“Da. That’s just it. It won’t go away for me. I’ll have to relive it every day.”
“You’re going to have to help me understand why you think that, son,
because I don’t see it that way. I see it being funny and fun for the
first time and then it will become normal and natural like everything
else in life.”
“Not this, Da. This isn’t normal. It’s not
natural at all. Ian is natural. The other boys at school are natural. I
ain’t natural.”
“Cullan! Are you talking about your penis? Do
you think there is something wrong with your penis? I can assure you
that there is nothing wrong with your penis son. I inspected you all
over when you were born and your penis is just like everyone else’s
penis. It’s even circumcised, even though your grandmother tried to
keep us from having it done, we knew that to be like the other boys
your penis had to be cut like theirs.”
“But mine isn’t like theirs.”
I start crying even though I try not to.
“Da. My penis isn’t like all the other boys. It isn’t even like Ian’s.”
“Of course, it’s like your brothers.”
“No. It’s not Da. Mine is way different.”
“Okay Cullan. I haven’t seen you naked in a long time, but I know your penis is the same as your brothers.”
“You haven’t seen me naked since first grade, because that’s when I discovered I’m different from other boys.”
I’m crying harder now and dad scoops me up into his arms and holds me
tightly to his chest. So tightly, I can feel and hear his heart
beating. He whispers into my ear.
“I love you, Cullan. I love
you so much. There is nothing wrong with you. I’m your Da and I know
you. You’re perfect. You are my perfect son.”
I collapse in Da’s arms.
Knock. Knock.
There is another soft knock and Da tells Mama to come in and she is as
bewildered as Da seems to be. I feel safe in Da’s arms. I feel like all
my cares are being washed away. I feel so calm and safe that I fall
asleep.